F#mEF#m
Uh Huh, extra cheese, uh huh, oh huh, save a piece for me.
[Verse 1]
AF#m
Pizza party at your house. I went just to check it out.
DE
Nineteen extra larges, what a shame. No one came!
AF#m
Just us eatin' all alone. You said, "Take the pizza home."
DE
No sense lettin' all this go to waste, so then I faced!
DF#m
Pizza all day and every day, cheese round the clock, it's getting me blocked.
DE
And I sure don't care for irregularity. Tell me!
[Verse 2]
F#mDE
Why'd ya have to go and make me so constipated.
F#mDE
Cause right now I'd do anything to just get my bowels evacuated in the bathroom.
F#mDAE
I sit and I wait, and I strain, and I sweat, and I clench, and I feel the pain, oh
BmE
Should I take a laxative or have my colon irrigated?
A
No, no, no.
[Verse 3]
AF#m
I was feeling pretty down, ‘til my girlfriend came around.
DE
We're just so alike in every way, I gotta say.
AF#m
In fact, I just thought I might pop the question there that night.
DE
I was kissin' her so tenderly, but woe is me!
DF#m
Who would have guessed her family crest
DE
And suddenly spied tattooed on her thigh
DE
And son of a gun it’s just like the one on me, tell me!
[Verse 4]
F#mDE
How was I supposed to know that we were both related, believe me.
F#mDE
If I knew she was my cousin we never, never would have dated, What to do now?
F#mDAE
Should I go ahead and propose and get hitched and have kids with eleven toes and
BmEA
Move to Alabama where that kind of thing is tolerated? No, no, no.
[Verse 5]
AF#m
I had so much on my mind. I thought maybe I'd unwind
DE
Try out that new roller coaster ride, and the guide
F#mDAE
Said not to stand but that's a demand that I couldn't meet. I got on my feet
BmE
And stood up instead, knocked off my head, you see. Tell me!
[Verse 6]
F#mDE
Why'd I have to go and get myself decapitated.
F#mDE
This really is a major inconvenience, Oh man, I really hate it. Such a drag now!
F#mDAE
I can't eat, I can't breathe, I can't snore, I can't belch or yodel anymore
BmE
Can't spit or blow my nose or even read sports illustrated. Oh, NO!
[Verse 7]
F#mDE
Why'd I have to go and get myself all mutilated?
F#mDE
I gotta tell ya life without a head kinda makes me irritated. What a bummer!
F#mDAE
I can't blink, I can't cough, I can't sneeze, but my neck is enjoin' a pleasant breeze now
BmEF#m
Haven't been the same since my head and I were separated. No, no, no.