E            G            E        G
I've got my twelve-sided die  and I'm ready to roll
        E             G      A
With my wizard and my goblin crew (strum mute)
   E                  G          E         G
My friends are coming over to my mom's basement
         E               G        A
Bringing funyuns and the mountain dew (strum mute)

           E         G          E      G
I've got a big broad sword made out of cardboard
        E          G       A
And the stereo's a pumpin' Zeppelin (Whole Lotta Love) (strum mute)
          E           G              E           G
It's that time of the night  we turn on the blacklight
        A                         G
Let the dungeons and the dragons begin...

           E         G          E          G
It's D and D!
E                G          E
Fighting with the legends of yore
     G     E     G     E    G
It's D and D!
E             G         A
Never kissed a lady before (nope, whoo!)

Interlude
E G E G E G A x2

        E           G               E           G
Now the Lord of the Rings, the Dark Crystal and things,
        E         G         A
we use these as a reference tool (strum mute)
            E          G               E         G
And when we put on our cloaks and tell warlock jokes,
          E        G           A
we’re the coolest kids in the school (strum mute)

No we're not, I know
    E              G              E            G
Now Teich's a real bastard, but a fair dungeon master,
         E              G
He's got hit points and charisma to lend (strum mute)
      E              G               E                 G
And I rehearse in my room, or what I call the dragon's tomb,
         E            G          A
when I'm not out with my girlfriend
           E         G          E          G
It’s D and D


second interlude
E G E G E G A x2


       E         G          E          G
It’s D&D
E             G         E
Summoning the demons of hell
       E         G          E          G
It’s D&D
         E                 G     A
When our shift ends at the Taco Bell (Gordita, Chalupa!)


        E        G                E                 G
Well my medieval brother, there's room here for another
          E              G           A
Would you care to take a roll of the die? (strum mute)
    E            G                   E         G
You guys make me weep you think that you could keep up
       E          G         A
with a warrior as mighty as I? (strum mute)
              E      G            E           G
See you’re in mortal danger I’m a first-class ranger
           E            G      A
whose half gargoyle and half-elf (strum mute)
       E            G               E        G
And if that doesn't scare you maybe I should beware you
        E            G         A
Of what lurks within my gaming shelf (strum mute)
            E          G              E       G
Next to my junior high annual lies my monster manual
       E          G               A
and my customized dungeon masters screen (strum mute)
         E             G           E           G
I've got treasures and traps on my graph paper maps
           E                G           A
next to my three-inch solid pewter figurines (strum mute)
          E                    G                   E              G
So if you think you've got the balls bring on your dungeon master calls
        E               G            A
I’ll be protected by my robe of destruction (strum mute)
       E                 G                     E              G
I will leave you both in tears because I’m the dungeon master here
        E          G                 A
And you two are in need of some instruction

      E         G          E          G
It's D&D

Warriors who terrify
It's D&D
Virgins till the day weeeeeeeee…
Oh, oh, oh, oh
No, No, No, No, No
1, 2, Fuck You
Dieeeee