C
Four and twenty virgins
     G           C
Come down from Inverness.
C
When the ball was over
           D                  G
There were four and twenty less.

[Chorus]
        F
Singin' Balls to your partner,
     C               F
Your ass against the wall.
C       
If you’ve never been had on a Saturday night,
G                        C
You've never been had at all.

[Verse]
C

There was doin' in the parlour,
          G            C
There was doin' on the stones.
    C
You couldn't hear the music
        D                G              
For the wheezin' and the groans.

[Chorus]
        F
Singin' Balls to your partner,
     C               F
Your ass against the wall.
C       
If you’ve never been had on a Saturday night,
G                        C
You've never been had at all.

[Verse]
C
The undertaker, he was there,
    G               C  
All wrapped up in a shroud,
C
Swingin' from the chandelier,
    D             G
And peein' on the crowd.

[Chorus]
        F
Singin' Balls to your partner,
     C               F
Your ass against the wall.
C       
If you’ve never been had on a Saturday night,
G                        C
You've never been had at all.

[Verse]
C
The village cripple, he was there,
    G              C 
But he couldn't do much.
      C
So he lined the ladies against the wall
    D                G
And did 'em with his crutch.

[Chorus]
        F
Singin' Balls to your partner,
     C               F
Your ass against the wall.
C       
If you’ve never been had on a Saturday night,
G                        C
You've never been had at all.

[Verse]
C                   
Miss Molly McFearson
    G               C
Was standin' way up front,
          C
With some posies in her hand,
                     G
And a carrot up 'er…

[Chorus]
        F
Singin' Balls to your partner,
     C               F
Your ass against the wall.
C       
If you’ve never been had on a Saturday night,
G                        C
You've never been had at all.

[Verse]
C
The village postman, he was there,
           G                C
Though the poor lad had the pox.
   C
He couldn't do the lassies,
      D             G
So he did the letterbox.

[Chorus]
        F
Singin' Balls to your partner,
     C               F
Your ass against the wall.
C       
If you’ve never been had on a Saturday night,
G                        C
You've never been had at all.

[Verse]
C
The village magician, he was there,
   G             C
He gave us all a laugh.
   C
He pulled his foreskin over his head,
    D               G
And vanished up his ass.

[Chorus]
        F
Singin' Balls to your partner,
     C               F
Your ass against the wall.
C       
If you’ve never been had on a Saturday night,
G                        C
You've never been had at all.