Strange Woman
Strange Bed
Thor's hammer poundin' in my head
Six straight double shots of high-grade single malt
And my mouth is tastin' dryer than table salt (a popcorn fart)

Yeah, but I know what I'm doin'
I'm on the road to ruin

Monday mornin'
Last Friday night
Well I had the feelin' everything was alright
Here I am in trouble with the love of my life
Hopin' she don't cut me with no butcher knife

I got brownie points a-cruin'
I'm on the road to ruin

Sun blindin'
Teeth grindin'
Ears burnin'
Stomach turnin'
Well, Summer's commin' and the winter's gone
Here I am still sleepin' with my blue jeans on
Well I had it goin' till I lost my job
Now I'm out here casin' out some joint to rob

Baby's needin' shooin'
I'm on the road to ruin

Sirens blarin'
Neighbors starin'
Judge's gavel
Well, I come unraveled
Well, I've been rollin' downhill since I was ten
My Les Paul livin's going to do me in
I can't get this roller-coaster rifle to a stop
'Cause when I hit the bottom I'm right back on top

Big ideas a-brewin
Well I'm on the road to ruin