E|-------------------------------------------|
B|-------------------------------------------|
G|----------------------------------------7--|
D|--------2--------2--------2--------2----7--|
A|--------2--------2--------2--------2----5--|
E|--3p-0--0--3p-0--0--3p-0--0--3p-0--0-------|

Repeat the riff 4 x

[E]Hey mama tell you what I say
[E]Said I'm lookin' for a friend today
[E]lookin for a friend I can trust
[E]he's gotta ride in a short school bus

{chorus}
[D]Retards.....[D]Make [D#]Good [E]Friends!
[D]Retards.....[D]Make [D#]Good [E]Friends!
[D]Retards.....[D]Make [D#]Good [E]Friends!

[E]My friend Marc wears a hockey helmet
[E]He shits his pants but he can't help it
[E]Out in public he beats his dick
[E]I use retards to pick up chicks

{chorus}

{bridge}

(lots of groaning and drooling)
[A][B][C][D]
[A][B][C][D][E]