And these cold sick dreams got my ears to bleed So I smoke two blunts under autumn leaves Now my lungs go numb and these feelings freeze But I can't help think 'bout your love in spring So I drove back home with these black scraped doors And my chest felt shit so I smoked some more And my friends out back in the sunroom porch While I'm passed out cold on this basement floor She been getting high with the door locked Paranoid thoughts when the phone talk I can feel the rain on the sidewalk Thinking bout our time on the boardwalk Haven't been fried in a minute But I'ma hit this blunt till it's finished I'm an asshole, I admit it But I can't deal with thoughts I've been given And it's hard to speak with my mental health So I sip some more in this cheap hotel And it's hard to trust when I hate myself, but I loved you more then life itself I smoke too much, but I love that numb My eyes glued shut in this bed I'm stuck I hate the thoughts that I get in the morning Don't think about the calls 'n the texts I'm ignoring I lost it all and I broke at last Took a marker out for my heart shaped cast I loved you more than I hate my past I needed you here when it all went bad I did it again I told myself I'd be fine when it ends I miss the blood on my lips, the taste of it there when we kissed 'N it went down I remember the call, I remember the sound of your voice Telling me, Telling me Over 'n over But all I could hear was the noise Fell for those drugs too fast 'n I'm drinking my thoughts away Won't feel the pain The shit in my stomach got me numb to this Not feeling it, keep filling my cup, everything is fine I'm good at bottling it up I was thinking that It hurts to know you'd never take it back 'n its kinda sad Really miss the things that we had And these cold sick dreams got my ears to bleed So I smoke two blunts under autumn leaves Now my lungs go numb and these feelings freeze But I can't help think 'bout your love in spring So I drove back home with these black scraped doors And my chest felt shit so I smoked some more And my friends out back in the sunroom porch While I'm passed out cold on this basement floor