This school of late has started reeking Quiet, maggots, when I'm speaking! Reeking with a most disturbing scent Only the finest nostrils smell it But I know it oh-too-well It is the odour of rebellion It’s the bouquet of dissent! And you may bet your britches This headmistress Finds this foul odiferousness Wholly olfactorily insulting And so to stop the stench’s spread I find a session of Phys Ed Sorts the merely rank from the revolting The smell of rebellion comes out in the sweat And Phys Ed will get you sweating And it won’t be long before I smell the pong Of aiding and abetting! Before a weed becomes too big and greedy You really need to nip it in the bud Before the worm starts to turn You must scrape off the dirt And rip it from the mud! The whiff of insurgence! The stench of intent! The reek of pre-pubescent protest! The funk of defiance! The odour of coup! The waft of anarchy in progress! Once we’ve exercised these demons They shall be too pooped for sceaming! Some double-time discipline Should stop the rot from setting in! Discipline Discipline For children who aren’t listening For midgets who are fidgeting And whispering in history Their chattering and chittering Their nattering and twittering Is tempered with a smattering of Discipline We must begin insisting On rigidity and discipline Persistently resisting This anarchistic mischieving These minutes you are frittering On pandering and pitying While little ones like this They just want discipline The simpering and whimpering The dribbling and the spittling The Miss, I need a tissue Is an issue we can fix There is no mystery to mastering The art of classroom mistressing It’s discipline, discipline, discipline! The smell of rebellion! The stench of revolt! The reek of pre-pubescent plotting! The whiff of resistance! The pong of dissent! The funk of moral fibre rotting! Imagine a world with no children Close your eyes and just dream Imagine, come on, try it The peace and the quiet A babbling stream Now imagine a woods with a cottage And inside that cottage we find A dwarf called Zeke, a carnival freak Who can fold paper hats with his mind And he says: Don’t let them steal your horses! Don’t let them throw them away! No! If you find your way through They’ll be waiting for you Singing: Neigh neigh neigh! She’s mad! Aha! And there, just like I said The stinking maggot rears his head Have you ever seen anything more repellent? Have you ever smelled anything worse Than that smell of rebellion? The stench of revolt! The reek of insubordination! The whiff of resistance! The pong of dissent! And I will not stop till you are squashed! Till this rebellion is quashed! Till glorious, sweaty discipline has washed This sickening scent Away!