Andrew: Oh hey Adam, what are you doing? Adam:Oh hey Andrew, I was just about to sing a song about my number one girl. Andrew: Oh yeh? Mind if I join you? Adam: Not at all, good buddy. Let's do it Andrew: Alright. Adam: I can cook you dinner, And be by your side, Bathe in the moonlight, Get lost in your eyes, Andrew: I'll run my hands through your hair As I caress your face We can cuddle all night And watch Will and Grace Together: 'Cos she's the girl for me Adam: Man those chicks really like that show Andrew: Among others... Adam: What do you mean? Andrew: Uh nothing Adam: OK Adam: I'll bring flowers to your doorstep When we go out on dates We can lay on the beach And I'll hand-feed you grapes Andrew: I can unwrap your package And you'll unwrap mine And I'll kiss your neck As I do you from behind Together: 'Cos she's the girl for me Adam: Uh, Andrew, what did you mean by unwrapping the other package? Andrew: You know, like presents and exchanging gifts and stuff like that. Adam: Oh, and why would you do it from behind? Andrew: You never heard of doggy style? Girls really like that. Adam: Oh OK. I thought you were saying gay things. Andrew: No. You know me better than that. Adam: Yeah, you're right, I'm sorry. Adam: I want you to say, You'll always be with me, I'll give you a backrub, Write you poetry Andrew: I can give you a Hummer, We can look for shoe sales, Then dance to the Village People And go to Chippendales Together: 'Cos she's the girl for me Adam: OK That was definitely gay Andrew: What the hell are you talking about? Adam: You know what a Hummer is, don't you? It's a blow job. Andrew: No it isn't. It just means oral sex. It can be used for both sexes. Adam: Are you sure? Cos I'm pretty sure it's referring to pleasuring the male... Andrew: Adam, trust me. Adam: Well then why the hell would you go to Chippendales? Andrew: What? You took your girlfriend to Centrefold, what's the difference? Adam: I don't know, there just is. Andrew: Well, I'm comfortable with my sexuality. If my girl wants to go see men strip, I wanna be there to support her. I'm sorry if you're too immature and insecure in your own sexuality to understand it. Adam: Well, since when have you danced to the Village People? Andrew: Oh, come on Adam. They play their stuff everywhere. Is everyone who dances to the Village People gay? Adam: No, I guess not. Andrew: You know what Adam? I think you're obsessed with gay people. Adam: No I'm not obsessed with homosexuals. Look, I'm sorry. I don't know what's gotten into me. Let's just continue with the song. I swear I won't jump to anymore conclusions. Andrew: Alright Adam: I'll try my best To be the man of your dreams Stay with you through hard times No matter how bad they seem Andrew: I'll kiss your Adam's Apple Put your balls in my mouth And give you a hand job Before I go south You being a chick Won't make me happy Pound my ass Pull out and cock-slap me 'Cos that's the guy for me I like dudes Andrew: ... What? Adam: What do you mean 'What?' That wasn't even inuendo. You're just talking about gay business. Andrew: Adam, you promised you wouldn't jump to conclusions. Adam: Jump to conclusions? How's a girl gonna pound your ass and cock-slap you? Andrew: ... She could be wearing a strap-on Adam: What?!? You explicitly said you like dudes and chicks don't make you happy. Andrew: You're taking that way out of context. Adam: Come on, you are gay. Just admit it. You like doing men. Andrew: I swear I don't. Adam: Andrew, seriously, you are gay. Andrew: ... Alright, maybe I am. Adam: OK. Andrew: OK. So. What do you wanna do now? Adam: Um. You wanna come over to my place? Andrew: Yeah alright. Adam: OK